We Need More Glitter

Remember how insistent I was that we were having another boy? How I lorded it over Ben that I had known - not just guessed - with the others and I was right again? The boasting that I was their mother and I knew them before they were fully formed?

Apparently, I got myself mixed up with God.

Apparently, God likes gently toppling over those who get a little grandiose with their thoughts.

We poked, prodded and twirled that kid around to get a look at every angle. I finally believed her when she turned the baby upside down and spread eagle and said "Kelly, if it was there then it would be dangling."

Well...alright then. We're having another beautiful little girl! That makes 3 girls and one very spoiled Little Prince. I'm still trying to wrap my head around this. 3 girls?!? That's A LOT of drama. That's a lot of pink. MY SISTER IS ALREADY TALKING ABOUT MORE TUTUS.

Since I was so set on another boy, we're lacking in the baby girl name department. My only rule is that the name not start with "D" to avoid people calling her DeeDee. Ben has a much more extensive process.

• No Welsh ("Come back with more vowels.")
• No Shakespeare ("Ophelia died after going bat-crap crazy!")
• No obviously sci/fi, fantasy or comic book related ("We are not naming her 'River' or 'Willow' so stop asking.")
• Nothing too common ("We already have Sophie.")
• Meaning is something good ("Mara means 'bitter'. Try again!")
• Must sound like a regular girl ("'Agnes' sounds like an old lady and 'Eden' sounds like a stripper!")
• Nothing that sounds too country-specific ("WOW, that's Irish/Jewish/German.")

We have our work cut out for us.

Thanksgiving 2012

That actually went well.

We left on Saturday morning with the intent of stopping in El Paso for the night. We had to stop every 2 hours so that Sophie and I could go potty. I will say this, that kid stayed dry the whole drive and never once complained about not-so-nice accommodations. The kids were satisfied to play with the iPad, iPhone and other random toys. It was pretty quiet. Gideon and Milly slept a little but Sophie never closed her eyes once.

At the hotel in El Paso, we only had one crib for Milly. We put Gideon and Sophie in the sofa bed for the night. Gideon already has a tough time sleeping and this night was worse than most. I finally hopped down and hauled him into bed next to me. There was not a lot of sleeping that first night. Of course, he made up for it the next day in the car. Mommy...not so much.

Finally on Sunday we arrived at Nana's house! There was much rejoicing, hugging, running and digging in the backyard. The great-grandparents got there on Monday and there was even more hugging and spoiling.

My SIL followed the kids around all week with her camera. She is my new hero.

Bits and Pieces

I am just no good at this blogging everyday thing. Here's what's been going on lately.

• Gideon is addicted to cheese. He eats two or three cheese sticks a day. Last night, I introduced him to Rotel dip. It's now his new love language.
• I've been pulling clothes and doing laundry all week. I think I finally have all of the kids' clothes ready to pack. Onto the adults stuff tonight.
• I've been mainlining Law & Order lately. It ticks me off that Netflix only has the first 8 seasons of the original show. I've watched all of them and moved on to SVU.
• Milly has a new lovey. It's a blanket with tags all around the sides. She tiptoes around the house with the lovey clutched to her cheek and her thumb in her mouth. CUTEST. THING. EVER.
•  Sophie got her hair cut at the salon. We went as soon as they opened and I let her explore for 20 minutes before sitting down. She did a great job. Her new haircut suits her perfectly!

And now, the picture parade...

Anniversary

Yesterday was the 9th anniversary of the day I lost my first baby. It's also the first time I did not remember until the day after. I suppose I've healed more than I thought.

9 years ago, I was married to my first husband. We had tried for nearly 9 months to get pregnant with no results. Those two lines were the most amazing sight I'd ever seen. I called my family in tears and squealed with my girlfriends at work. It was a Friday. All weekend I floated on air.

On Tuesday morning, I woke up and spent the day in the ER. An ultrasound showed no baby.

I felt empty. I felt like a failure. I didn't want to speak, go to work, bathe or do anything other than sleep and watch TV. That lasted for years.

Now I have 3 children and another kicking my insides. While they are very healing, I know that it truly began after I turned back to prayer and started taking my therapy seriously. I'm grateful for every person that helped me through that dark time.

If this has happened to you, please know that it will get better. You are not alone.

Trip Readiness Check

On the 17th, we will load up three rowdy children into the minivan and begin the 2 day drive to Phoenix, AZ. We will spend a week with Ben's parents, grandparents, his sister and her husband.

That's a lot of family. I could not be more thrilled.

Of course, the drive has me wary. We have Sophie, who is not quite potty trained and doesn't enjoy sleeping in the car. Then there's Gideon, who likes sleeping in the car as long as he's comfortable. We're switching his booster seat back to his bigger and more sleep-inducing convertible car seat. Milly is a good car rider and sleeps pretty well.

Tonight we finished the laundry and pulled out the majority of the kids clothes to be packed. I keep double checking my list to make sure that we don't get out to El Paso the first night and realize that Gideon only has one pair of pants or Sophie doesn't have any socks. I'm a worrywart about packing and I almost always over pack. I'm trying to hit the right balance of enough-but-not-too-much. I'm trying to keep in mind that there will be a Target in Phoenix should we need anymore Minnie Mouse panties or shampoo. We even bought space bags to pack the clothes. They're supposed to mush out all of the air and pack almost flat. Anyone have any experience with these things?

We're also cleaning off and backing up my phone and the iPad tonight. I've got a good amount of apps to keep Sophie and Gideon busy in the car. Milly just likes to chew her new taggie blanket and giggle at whatever is outside her window. I'll throw in a couple of toys to give them some screen-free time in the car. They'll all take their blankets and pillows. I'll have my Kindle since Sophie will probably steal my phone.

Tomorrow begins the errand running of dry cleaners, alterations, car prep and snack food hoarding. Any suggestions are welcome. Prayers are reeeeeeally welcome.

Baby Update

I skipped the post for yesterday and I nearly skipped today. Last night, I was juggling a lot of body issues and a filthy fridge. Ben helped me clean out the fridge - praise GOD for him - and I finally relieved enough pain to fall asleep around 1 AM.

This pregnancy is kicking my tuckus. Let's run down the numbers.

HOW FAR ALONG ARE YOU?
18 weeks

HOW BIG IS THE BABY?
According to the emails, the baby is the length of a bell pepper and weighs about 7 ounces. The little monster is big enough to put an ache in my back if I walk too much and I can feel teensy kicks.

ANY ISSUES?
OH GOLLY GEE...I think the worst is this freakin' rash. Sometimes having a parasite invade your body makes your body revolt in interesting ways. In this case, it's acting like I'm allergic. I'm itchy, bumpy, red and that makes me seriously irritable. Thank the Lord for aloe with lidocane. I also get some pretty wicked heartburn which makes me wonder about the old wives tale that says "heartburn" equals "baby will have hair". It was true for Gideon and Milly. Sophie was my only bald baby.

ANY CRAVINGS?
I would love to bathe in pasta and orange Gatorade.

WHAT COMES NEXT?
I'll hit 20 weeks during Thanksgiving but we'll be in Arizona. I'll go on the 28th to see if the baby gets showy. I'm also going to start my progesterone shots next week. My excitement. LET ME SHOW IT TO YOU. Every week until the baby gets here, I'll get a shot in my hip. This should keep the baby cooking until full term.

I love my babies but my body hates pregnancy. It's going to be fun to see this little one.

Kicky Little Thing

Best quote from the 17-week checkup today came from my doctor during an ultrasound.

"Well, I could tell you the sex but the baby's kicking so much I can't tell if it's a leg or a penis."

Resolutions for the Holidays

I recently got the chance to join Go Mighty. It's a site where people can make and share their Life List. I'm slowly writing my list and wondering how to achieve these goals. Today, Maggie Mason shared a story about 12 things she wants to do this holiday season. I took some inspiration and made my own list.

1. Take a family picture at Thanksgiving. My husband’s whole family will be together for the first time in nearly a decade. I’ve added three little ones to this family. This needs a good picture.
2. Make some amazing food with my MIL for Thanksgiving. I’ll either have to dial back the butter or convince her that one day of badness is worth it. It’s time for the good mashed potatoes.
3. Make Christmas cards with the kids. They love doing projects and they are learning so many new skills in school. It’s time to put them to work making things for family and friends.
4. Take Sophie shopping for gifts. I think she’s old enough now to understand the concept of giving gifts at Christmas. It will be fun to see what she chooses for her family.
5. Decorate a tree with my little family. There is no right way to do this. I just want to see the kids hanging ornaments while Christmas music plays.
6. Everyone gets pajamas and socks for Christmas Eve. Perfect for a night of Christmas movies and cookies.
7. Take the kids to look at Christmas lights. I think the grandparents would enjoy going.
8. Make stockings for all of my family’s women. This is such a fun present. It’s wonderful to tailor all of the little stuffers to your loved one.
9. Bring holiday food to hospital employees working on Christmas Eve/Day. They’re giving up such a special time so that they can serve others. I want them to feel special.
10. Buy Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners for families in need.
11. Fill a shoebox for Operation Christmas Child, buy gifts for Angel Trees and donate to Child’s Play. Giving makes me feel glad.
12. Make a New Years Dinner for me and Ben. I want to celebrate the start of a new year with my beloved.

Ask Him

me: "I miss going to church. It's just so difficult to get out of the house with three kids; two of which are VERY particular about their schedules."

Ben: "I know. I miss it, too. We can always watch different sermons at home. Lake Pointe and Lifechurch.tv both stream every Sunday."

"I would like that. It's just...I feel guilty doing that every Sunday. I feel like my brain is telling me that Online Church is for that once-and-a-while time where we have to miss because someone is sick. Which is ridiculous."

"That's not at all what it's for. It's for people like us that can't get to a physical church building but still want to participate. Nowhere in the Bible does it say that we have to make an appearance somewhere each Sunday."

"I talk to God every day. Not just pray; TALK. I talk with my friends about our faith and struggles. I read my Bible. I seek God out daily. I try to teach the kids in their own special way about God and how much He loves them. I try my hardest to live the way God wants me to live. I never feel like I'm doing enough."

"What does God say about that?"

"Huh?"

"Have you asked God if you're doing enough?"

"Well...no. I usually just apologize for doing so little."

"It might be time to ask God and listen to what He says."

My Shopping Trip

We needed some errands run today. I did the summer-to-winter clothes switch in the kids room and took inventory. Gideon was fine. Milly could use some shirts. Sophie had 2 shirts, 2 jeans and 2 pants to her name. The pants are nearing high-water territory and the jeans give her plumbers crack. Since she's so difficult to fit, I brought Sophie along with me. We also took a play kitchen that the kids only use so they can slam the fake fridge door.

I've realized that Sophie is out of toddler clothes and starting to need little girl clothes. My usual go-to place is Target and resale shops for kiddo clothes. Unfortunately, I've seen very little in the way of clothes I will allow my little girl to wear in Target. Off to Once Upon a Child we went. We turned in the kitchen at the front and began to browse. Sophie trotted up and down aisles pulling every blingy-sequiny pink and purple piece of clothing down.

"IS SO PITTY! IS SPARKERS!"
"Yes, dear. I know you prefer the Liberace look."

Here's what we came home with:

• pair of jeans (Sophie)
• pair of purple pants (Sophie)
• 4 long sleeved shirts (Sophie)
• sweater dress (Sophie)
• jacket (Sophie)
• 3 dinosaurs (Gideon)
• Texas Tech onesie (New Kid)
• Rangers dress (Milly)
• sparkly purple hair bow (Sophie)

 After the resale of the kitchen and a 20% coupon, I paid a little over $20. TWENTY DOLLARS. This is why it pays to shop resale.

After the victory lap, we ran to Target for a few things. Sophie and I go to Target often and at the end of the shopping trip we usually get an Icee for Sophie and a drink for me. Sophie laid back in the cart with her cherry Icee and grinned at me.

"I love a shop wit Mama."

So do I, baby.

Picky Eaters

It's hard to cook every night. I've tried making meal plans, prepping food and freezing it, shopping only for a week and trying to use it up before going back to the store, etc. It all comes down to making myself get up and go to the blasted kitchen. I have a few go-to recipes that Ben and I enjoy. We like chicken parm casserole, Greek chicken pitas, sour cream chicken enchiladas and shredded BBQ chicken sandwiches.

Then...there are the kids.

I was about to type that Sophie is my pickiest eater but I deleted it. Honestly, Gideon now takes that crown. He likes the following:

• deli ham, plain
• crunchy cheetos
• pop tarts
• jelly sandwiches
• dry apple jacks
• oranges and pineapple

Wow. I didn't know the list was that short until I started making it. Sophie's list is three times that length! Milly is more adventurous and just doesn't like to get bored.

They also all have different texture issues. Gideon used to like bananas but now he doesn't want to hold them. Sophie loses her mind at anything sticky. Milly doesn't like handling cold meat.

Tonight, I made a big pot of spaghetti. Plain stuff; browned hamburger from the freezer, leftover Prego and noodles. Nothing fancy.

Sophie ate a HUGE plateful and patted her distended belly.
Milly picked out some noodles and bit them in half.
Gideon stared at his plate.

Unless I start making fruit platters for dinner, they're never going to eat the same thing at the same time.

What are your family favorites? Any odd aversions?

NaBloPoMo

When I heard about the challenge to blog every day in November, I thought it was a great idea. I do love to write here and there are even some people that find me amusing.

There are also people that like blood sausage, but there you go.

I sat at my computer last night and linked my blog to the Blogher site and began to compose something introductory and witty.

Then my kids became convinced that sleep would cause their flesh to fall from their bones.

So, after a rousing night of moving kids from bed to bed to bed and soothing and rocking and groaning and begging and waking every 45 minutes to blow my nose and go to the bathroom - thank you NEW KID for following peer pressure before you even have all of your internal organs - here I am.

More to come.